One Month I
Today is the first day of month two of the year, and that seems as good of a time as any to update my yearly goals. I haven’t forgotten them yet, and have been working very hard at trying to keep them up, but not quite hard enough yet.
I went for an awfully long time before I even said a cuss word. Since then I have said a few, but I have been pretty good. The is only one instance that I thinkof that I was out of line with what I said, so that is much better than I was doing before the turn of the year. I figure now I can say some cuss words, depending on the company and context and everything, as long as it is not inappropriate or too vulgar.
The religion thing hasn’t been going so well. I feel like sometimes I am a better person, but not always. I still haven’t made it to church yet, so that is something I need to get on. So this is a negative so far.
I don’t know if that 3.5 is going to be possible, I haven’t had a clue in my physics class yet, but the rest I should be alright. I went to bed at an appropriate time for the first week or so, but even that has been getting later and later. I have been spending entirely too much money, eating not great, and not been very nice to my friends/ family. So I still have a lot of work to do.
The girl situation I am not sure how it is going. I don’t know what to think. But I suppose I just need to keep up what I have been doing.
Goals I’ve reached
All summer I worked towards two things, and these two things were the only things I cared about. Then I received both of them at the beginning of the school year, and after receieving them, I had to think, did I really want these things. With the one, things weren’t working out great to start with, but have since taken a turn for the better and things are going quite swell, and as for the other, things started out decently, but have slowly gotten worse. If I could’ve only gotten one of the two things, it is the thing that is working out now, but all of my life I have strived for the other, and now I am wondering if it is all worth it. I think, is this how I want to spend the next four years of my life? If I improve, I am sure it will get better, but it is very tough to improve at a rate that would put me on the same level in such a short time. It is going to be a long process. So, I guess, just be careful what you wish for, but if you really want something, go for it all the way.
My Time
A lot of times I will have ideas to make plans with people, and I will even tell them I will call them, but in my eyes, time seems to move about 100 times slower than it really is. So when I look at the clock and it says 1:46, and I was supposed to call my friends at 11:30, I felt like an asshole. So, I need to know, how does one keep a better track of time. I mean it is possible that I fell asleep in this timeframe, and just didn't realize it, but who knows.
Sam Cassell… cutest man in America
Today I was watching some highlights of the NBA playoffs, and I kept noticing one player more than the rest. His name is Sam Cassell and I am here today to make the argument that he is the cutest man in the United States of America. I mean, just look at him, his misshapen egg head, if you look at the correct angle, it almost looks like an alien head. When he is really happy, he will flash you the biggest, toothiest grin I have seen since watching Mr. Ed when I was a kid. Othertimes, he gets really angry, and the veins in his neck stick out. His eyes
get really beady, and his mouth swings open like something is trying to escape from it. His eyes are pretty beady, except when he is very focused on something, then they almost look like they are trying to jump out of his face and throw a party or something. That is why I would like to nominate all 6′3″ 185lbs of Sam Cassell as the cutest man in America. Go Clips!
Future
If you could see the future, would you take that opportunity to learn what you would become and find out where the next however long will take you?
I don't know if I would. I would like to know, but then you might find out something about yourself and worry about it, and try to change it, and that would make the time we are living in much worse. I think if I had the opportunity, I would fast forward my life a year or 5, then I would be done with my bachelor's degree, and most of the way through my Masters. I would be married, have a decent job, and working hard at my masters. I would have a job all lined up for after I get my degree, a house, a decent car, and everything will be going smoothly.
Between then and now, who knows what is going to happen? They always say getting there is half of the fun, so I am looking forward to it. Making some great memories with my friends. Who knows though, I mean, we could all be blown off of the face of the earth by some stupid Nuclear warhead or something, or an asteroid that got too close to the earth and was pulled in by the gravitation. Or, on a smaller scale, I could get smashed by a falling piano while walking on campus one day, or get caught under a gas truck, that's the worst. I have been lucky so far in my life, I have never had to bury any of my friends, so hopefully I keep that streak going. My parents aren't that old, so I don't think I have to worry about that, but who knows.
All we can do is get up each day, and make the most of it, never settle for anything less than your wildest dream, because it might be the last chance you get to run through that flower filled meadow, or wish upon that shooting star, or hold that person you care about so much, or sing at the top of your lungs that song you have playing on the radio.
I read a quote recently by Ghandi or somebody, it said… Live each day as if it were your last, but learn as if you were going to live forever. I have been trying to live by that, but some days are tougher than others to not just take the easy road and say, well I can just make up for it tomorrow.
Enjoy the rest of your day, and have an even better tomorrow.
The way things are going
Last week may have been one of the worst weeks I have had in a long time. My watch broke, I had no idea where I was heading in life, I failed a physics test horribly, and kept dwelling on the negative things in my life. I was worrying about work, my parents, gas, passing my classes, and all sorts of things. At one point I was as close to a nervous breakdown as I have ever been in my life, and I am usually the epitome of calm. I don't get worked up over these small things.
When I woke up this morning, I decided that this week was going to be different, I was going to do my best to make it one of the best in recent memory. I made it to my classes on time, got out of my second one early, studied a little for my Calc test, and ate some of the best chicken I have ever had. I just need to make sure to pass my Calc test on Thursday. If I get a 63 on both this test and the final I pass the class with a C, and if I don't, then I have to retake the class, so I am getting at least a 63 on both tests. If I study well enough for this test, and pull out an 85 or something, then I just have to worry about making it to my final on time, which is an hour before the class normally starts. Why do they do that? Make me get up an hour earlier than I normally have to, and I have a heck of a time getting up as it is. I am going to take Alison to Coney Island one day this week, she has never been there, and it is a staple of Fort Wayne and I have many childhood memories from that place. Thursday night we are going out to eat with my parents, at a restaurant I could never afford, so I am kind of excited for that. Friday and Saturday I am completely free, so I am sure we will all meet up and have a good time, so I am excited for this week. The only thing that could bring me down would be failing that Calc test, and I am not going to let that happen.
Have a good week everyone.
